"Do not be fooled by me.
Don't let my appearances fool you.
Because they are nothing more than a mask, perhaps a thousand masks that I am afraid to take off, although none represent me.
I give the impression of being sure, that everything is going smoothly, both inside and outside, that I am confidence personified, that calm is my second nature, that I control the situation and that I HAVE NO NEED OF ANYONE.
But do not believe me, i beg you.
Externally I may seem calm, but what you see is a mask.
Underneath, hidden, is my true self mired in confusion, fear and loneliness. But I hide it.
I do not want anyone to know it.
It terrifies me to think that it can be known. That is why I constantly need to create a mask that hides me, a pretentious image that protects me from shrewd looks.
But those looks are precisely my salvation, and I know it perfectly, as long as they are accompanied by acceptance and love.
Then, those looks become the instrument that can free me from myself, from the defense mechanisms and barriers that I have erected around me, the instrument that can show me what I can't convince myself of: that I really have a value.
But I am not telling you this, I have no courage:
I am afraid that your gaze is not accompanied by acceptance and love.
Maybe I'm afraid of what you might think, that you might change your mind about me, that you make fun of me and that your smile will strike me down.
Deep down, what I fear is worthless, and that you realize and reject me.
That is why I continue with my game of desperate pretensions, with an external appearance of security and with a trembling child inside.
I unfold my parade of masks and let my life become a fiction.
I tell you everything that does not matter at all, and nothing that really matters,
of what consumes me inside.
Therefore, when you recognize this routine, do not be fooled by my words: listen carefully to what I am not telling you, what I want to say, what I need to say, but cannot say.
I don't like to hide, I assure you, I would love to be spontaneous, sincere and genuine, but you will have to help me.
Please hold out your hand, even if it seems like that's the last thing I want.
You can bring out my vitality, every time you show yourself kind, attentive and diligent, every time you try to understand me, every time you accept me as such and despite what I am.
Because you love me, my heart beats and is reborn.
I want you to know how important you are to me and the power you have, if you want, to bring out the person that I am.
Listen to me, I beg you.
You can tear down the barriers behind which I take refuge, you can tear off my mask, you can free me from my lonely prison.
Don't ignore me! Don't walk past me, please bear with me.
Sometimes it seems that the closer you get, the more I rebel against your presence.
It is irrational, but it is like this: I fight what I need.
This is how humans are many times!
But love, the love of God that dwells in you, is stronger than all resistance, and therein lies my hope, my true hope.
Help me to break down the barriers with your firm hands, but at the same time delicate, because inside me there lives a child and a child is always very fragile.
Are you wondering who I am? I am someone you know very well. I am every person you meet. I am… Yourself ”.